Over the past several years, there has been much discussion and disagreement over the figure that 50% of marriages end in divorce, yet the percentage keeps changing. The decision of when or whether to get married is frequently delayed for younger generations. Although the divorce rate varies based on demographics, it may happen to any relationship, and most couples have a very serious anxiety about avoiding a split-up. While the most frequent reasons for divorce have been listed as being related to money and communication, let’s look at a few more factors that contribute to marriage failure.
- Misbehavior: Contemptuous intents may be seen in actions like rudeness, name-calling, swearing, and anything else that makes the other person feel horrible about themselves. The future of your marriage may be in jeopardy if the person you are meant to feel safe and protected from treats you with contempt. Negative criticism, silent treatment, withdrawal, and distance, concupiscence, nagging, defiantness, refusing to resolve conflicts, and holding onto unrealistic expectations can have a brutally negative impact on a marriage.
- Ignoring: Marriages frequently end in divorce when one spouse is ignorant of the needs of the other and disregards or disrespects those needs. Instead of overloading and bringing them down, a partner should be the one who constantly encourages them to improve. The Prophet of Allah (SAW) told us in a hadith
“the believer who shows the most perfect faith are those who have the best behavior, and the best of you are who are the best to their wives”
- Lies: A believer is prohibited from lying by the All-Powerful Allah. One is held accountable for all of the falsehoods they have ever spoken, and it is considered one of the major sins. A falsehood frequently starts a chain of lies in a marriage, which ultimately drags the pair to the brink since there is no longer any trust.
- False promises: Typically, partners don’t give priority to the commitments they make. They break their word and bring harm to the other person. Because you and your spouse weren’t on the same page, a generic commitment sometimes causes partners to accidentally break a promise. They are not jointly worked on by the pair. They recognise the issues, but frequently choose not to confront them, which results in a failed marriage.
- Lack of Intimacy: An essential component of a successful and happy marriage is intimacy. Marriages with little intimacy are more common than you would assume. Those who are in this circumstance are interested to discover if a relationship can endure this or not, despite the fact that the reasons for this differ. An essential component of a successful and happy marriage is intimacy. Is it a problem if you’re not as intimate as you previously were? Marriages with little intimacy are more common than you would assume. Those who are in this circumstance are interested to discover if a relationship can endure this or not, despite the fact that the reasons for this differ. Stress, resentment, and rejection often contribute to the lack of intimacy in your marriage.
- Lack of Attention: No matter how hectic our lives are, whether we are vying for a promotion, or whether there is a scheduling issue, paying attention is crucial. Knowing the value of connection and attention can help you discover a solution. Lack of attention from one spouse to the other might set off a series of events and possibly result in greater arguments later on in the relationship. In a relationship, not paying attention is the same as not communicating. They have a connection.
- Suspicion & Backbiting: Allah tells in the Holy Quran:
“Believers, avoid being excessively suspicious, for some suspicion is a sin. Do not spy, nor backbite one another. Would any of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? You would surely detest it” {49:12}
Suspicion may spread like a toxic blossom, bringing with it a growing number of problems. When you’re suspicious, everyone and everything is under suspicion. If you let it, it grows on you. The objective is to take preventative measures if you have suspicions; you may discuss the situation or take action. Some people decide to simply wait it out, and that’s when you start to like it. If left uncontrolled, you may develop paranoia and occasionally harbour false suspicions.
- Abandoning The Worship of Allah: Almighty Allah would never be pleased with a person who refuses to worship him and follow his counsel. This frequently leads to marital setbacks and creates a doorway for misfortunes and wrongdoings to enter a couple’s household, causing major issues and ultimately a separation.
By consistently attempting new things and engaging in novel experiences with your partner, you may safeguard your marriage. List the enjoyable activities you and your partner like doing together before making a list of what you’d want to attempt next. Avoid bad habits and schedule once a week to do something new and interesting!
